Bad Moms Is An Awful Movie

I recently saw Bad Moms at home thinking it may be okay because Mila Kunis is a self-professed nerd chick and she would present us bad mothers in a good light. I could trust the person brave enough to carry the spawn of the guy who created Punkd! and who was once married to Demi Moore, right? Wrong. So wrong.

In this movie, mothers are complete assholes to each other. Bad mommy, bad, right? No. Being bad to another woman is not what makes a woman a bad mother. It just makes her a mean woman.  Anyhow, brave, beautiful Mila Kunis unites the good mommies against a crazy alpha mommy played by the dumb blonde teen from Married With Children, Christina Applegate. It was awful. Women hating on women. The men don’t get off any better either. The husband is a useless cheater, and the other is eye candy. The women in this movie can’t figure out on their own that they don’t need anyone to liberate them. They don’t need Mila Kunis to save them. They can just do their own thing and ignore the crazy alpha. We all know this crazy alpha, right? Male or female alphas are everywhere. If you follow her, talk to your therapist. You need help too. Do what you think is best for you and your children, and ignore this person.

I was hoping to see a movie about real Bad Moms. You know, the ones whose homes are a mess and who occasionally forget meetings and who don’t buy the right shoes and who sometimes curse their own fertility. The ones who yell and curse at their children sometimes and apologize profusely to them later, and then cry themselves to sleep for being such a bad mom. That’s a “bad mom.” That was the movie I expected to see. This movie was just a shit Hollywood fantasy where drop dead gorgeous 30 year old Mila Kunis is called “old.”